by Jack Watts
As I thoughtfully look about,
Appraising my circumstances,
Which are not what I desired—
Not at all what I had planned—
I don’t understand where You are leading,
Nor do I understand why I must travel
This difficult path in isolation—
in solitude. I wanted my life to be so different—
To be easier and more carefree—
But this has not been my experience.
As I see the smiling faces of others—
Those who talk about You as if
They know You intimately but are shallow—
I wonder why their lives appear to be
Free from disappointment and conflict,
While mine has been so stressful and taxing.
I wonder if I will ever experience joy again?
Father, tell me, when will Your pruning hand
Be finished with my character transformation?
When will I awaken from the darkness of despair,
To a bright, sunny day, filled with hope and promise—
Free from sorrow—free from loss and pain?
When will You strengthen me in a mighty way?
When will You say to my enemies,
“This is my child—my beloved offspring—
Whom I have fortified and established.
Let all who criticize know that it is I—
The great ‘I Am’ who has done this work in him.”
Father, I know You are in charge—
That You have numbered my days—
And my future is in Your hands.
It is within Your power to change everything—
To allow my life to have more meaning than it has.
Please finish Your redemptive pruning quickly,
So that I can withstand this swirling wind,
Along with its foreboding and menacing clouds,