No Such Thing as an Overprotective Parent
“Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.” — Proverbs 22:6 NLT
“Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck.” — Proverbs 1:8-9 NIV
In our home, we had many rules—rules we firmly believed were essential for raising our children well. One of the most important was that our kids could not sleep over at someone else’s house unless we knew the parents well. It didn’t matter if the family attended the same church, lived in the same neighborhood, or if their children were frequent visitors to our home. If we didn’t have a close relationship with the parents, the answer was always “No.”
Naturally, this rule earned us the label of being “overprotective.” We heard it from our children, their friends, and even from the parents of those friends. “Why can my child stay at your home, but yours can’t stay at ours?” they’d ask. It might have seemed hypocritical to some, but we were clear: we were responsible for raising our own children, not someone else’s. Every parent has the right to set their own rules, and we did so out of love and responsibility.
Our decision was simple: we could not, in good conscience, allow our children to stay overnight at a home unless we were certain they wouldn’t be exposed to anything harmful—physically, emotionally, psychologically, or spiritually. Why? Because we loved them and believed it was our job to protect them.
Being a parent means sometimes making unpopular decisions. But when you’re doing what is right in God’s eyes and for the well-being of your children, you can trust that He will support you. Parenting isn’t the responsibility of a daycare, school, relatives, friends, or anyone else—it is your sacred duty. The world offers countless influences, but it’s up to you, as a parent, to determine who and what will shape your child.
You are responsible for guiding, protecting, providing for, and nurturing your child’s well-being—physically, emotionally, spiritually, and cognitively. And when your decisions are based on love, wisdom, prayer, and Biblical principles, there is no such thing as being “overprotective.”
Some parents may feel it’s their duty to let their children make all their own choices, whether it’s about daily routines, friendships, religious beliefs, or what they watch and read. This “hands-off” or liberal parenting style often stems from a belief that allowing children to make their own decisions shows respect for their independence. Others may simply be too busy or tired to make the effort to guide their children in all aspects of life.
But as loving parents, we must recognize that young people, by definition, lack the experience and judgment needed to make significant decisions. While it’s important to teach children how to make wise choices, it’s irresponsible to leave everything up to them. Our role is to be actively involved in guiding them and to make decisions on their behalf when necessary.
Proverbs 4:7 tells us, “Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do! And whatever else you do, develop good judgment.” The wisdom we gain through prayer, discernment, and Biblical guidance will help us make the best decisions for our children. And sometimes, that means protecting them from situations they may not fully understand.
As parents of three grown children and six grandchildren, we’ve learned that good parenting is not something you are born with—it’s something you develop over time. Decades of experience in parenting, pastoring, and operating a daycare have given us valuable insight into family dynamics. But no amount of education compares to hands-on experience. What works in theory doesn’t always work in practice.
People often have different definitions of what constitutes successful parenting. For some, success means raising well-educated children who achieve financial success and hold prestigious job titles. For others, it’s about comparing their children’s achievements to those of their peers.
But true success in parenting is about providing a child with the greatest opportunity to fulfill God’s purpose for their life. It’s about nurturing a whole person who will make a difference in the world. A successful parent helps raise children who live with purpose, fulfillment, joy, and a deep faith in God.
The Bottom Line
Successful parenting involves protecting your children. And in that, there is no such thing as being “overprotective” if your decisions are rooted in love, wisdom, prayer, and Biblical principles. Our children’s safety, well-being, and spiritual growth are our responsibility, and we must take it seriously. There is no greater calling than raising the next generation with wisdom, love, and a clear sense of God’s direction. Trust that when you parent according to His guidance, He will support you in your efforts.